What is write?

A friend of mine from Manila tagged me in a note on Facebook. He asked three questions---all pertaining to writing. I thought it came at such an odd time since I finally decided to start a blog and all that. The questions really made me think. Thanks Ramil!

1.) Who do you write for?

I ask myself this question all the time. As I stated in an earlier entry, who really cares what I have to say? I have always been uncomfortable when people label me as a writer. Who isn't a writer in Manila? The craft of writing has been muddied by blogging, ghost-writing and the event of celebrity writers. (i.e. Celine Lopez and Tim Yap) If this is the standard of writing today, then yes, I would rather be known as a jewelry designer. or a bitch.

I definitely write for myself---most especially now since i'm always alone with my thoughts in SF. I used to love writing when i was younger---mostly letters. I wrote lengthy 3-5 single spaced letters to my friends when i was living in Italy. Little did I know that these letters were being passed around to friends of friends. To this day I still have total strangers going up to me and saying, "Are you the Dara of the Bagoong letter? My sister/cousin/friend sent me the letter you wrote. I can't believe you did that!"

So yeah...I guess you could say I kind of fell into writing. I have always been opinionated but to have to set my thoughts down on paper is another story. I can only write when I'm passionate about something---much to the dismay of my exasperated mother who thinks I should be writing more than I actually do. 

I am a lazy writer. Though I do acknowledge the fact that I am blessed with being able to paint a picture and express myself through words, writing has become a chore. In the last couple of years, it really has been like drawing blood from a stone. Partly because of the fact that yes, there is the pressure to have people take what i have to say seriously...to not be bunched in with the private girls' school, English-speaking ditzes who have nothing else to talk about other than fashion and charitable causes. I still think to truly be a writer, you have to have some sort of Journalism degree. Yet I find myself enjoying books by people who have no such educational background. So yes, my view of writing is highly romanticized.

For as much as I hate myself for starting a blog, I think I need it---just so I can start to enjoy writing again. I don't expect anyone to agree with my thoughts. A blog is really just a public journal. The general public doesn't have to read it---they CHOOSE to read it. So the argument that bloggers are self-serving, egotistical schmucks has been completely shot down right there because we don't force people to read what we write. It's not my problem if i offend someone with something I've written because if I have, it usually means one of two things: 1.) it's true and 2.) people see the ugly versions of themselves and are pissed because someone actually called them out on it. It's like exposing an open secret. It also works both ways. The blogger becomes vulnerable to attack the minute the post becomes public domain. But like everything else, we all have the choice to be affected by it or not. It's almost like a test of character on both ends.

The power of the written word has always amazed and baffled me. I used to take it for granted until i realized how much it evokes so much emotion and controversy in people. Most of my status update musings have gotten me into a lot of trouble---even when I'm not particularly talking about anyone. I get PM's asking me who I'm talking about and no one believes me when I say no one. Yet everyone always has someone in mind. If anything, it's a great study on the psychology of social interaction.

2.) Do you think that what you write is relevant to Filipinos?

Yes, I do. I can't write something I'm not familiar with. Yes, most of the stuff I write for myself is shallow as hell---it's all about social climbers, drugs, who's sleeping with who in the family, politicians on the down low...all the fun sordid things that make Manila what it is. The society we (or at least I live in) is a goddamn Telenovela. I can pretend to be interested in politics and saving the world, but that would be hypocritical. 

 I remember writing a social commentary which got published in the Inquirer a couple of years back. It was about what I saw during a fashion show and the groups that were there. I don't think I told my mom I wrote it. She just saw it in the paper when her friends started calling her. Her initial reaction was, "What did you say now? The people you were talking about were some of my friends!" Yup. But it was all true. Even she couldn't deny it.

That's also probably why i like to write about food, travel and music. I can do endless research on those three topics and never get bored. If ever, I get very frustrated because there are so many things I don't and can't possibly know in my lifetime. There's only so much you can bitch, moan and vent about a society that will always be what it is. Am I going to do something about it? Of course not.  But I like to indulge in its pettiness once in awhile. It gives me a greater appreciation for the rest of the world and how it lives. If I can make one person say, "OMG, I don't want to be like that and there's got to be something bigger than aspiring to be in the Tatler!" then I've gotten my point across.

3.) Do you agree that most Filipinos do not read stuff by Filipino writers (this may apply more to literary writers) because writers are so narcissistic, egoistic, locked in our "ivory towers", etc. that we fail to write what Filipino readers want or need to read?

OK...I may not be answering this properly but...here's my two cents worth.

First of all...it depends who your Filipino reader is. If you're talking about the Yes! readers, then yeah, we're feeding them exactly what they want. Call me presumptuous, but i don't think the majority of Filipinos read---yes, even the so-called "educated" ones. And when they do read, it's more for an escape---to live vicariously through someone else's life to get away from the dreariness of their reality. I could be wrong, but I've also observed that most publications tend to be visual more than written content driven. 

As writers, maybe we have given the public too much control over what we write. It is, after all, a business. Who wants to read a magazine or a book that doesn't interest them? So does this mean that as a writer, we're just supposed to churn out what they want? Is a writer supposed to have a social obligation to educate a populace that seems content with just being able to keep up with the rest of the world on a material basis? What exactly is the role of a writer in the context of Manila society?

I admit...I do not seek out Filipino writers---and I know there are good ones out there. Mainly because, I don't know anything about them other than what I was exposed to in high school and college. I have yet to read El Filibusterismo and Noli Me Tangere. (it was banned in Woodrose when i was there) But there are certain writers I will read when i open up the paper. More often than not, it's usually Conrado de Quiros or Ambeth Ocampo. and Teddy Boy Locsin, when he actually decides to write. 

I have never been a huge fan of fiction but I notice that I seek out Filipino fiction writers when I am based in the US. Primarily because they manage to capture the loneliness of living in this country.  I wish someone would give me a list on stuff I SHOULD be reading. 

I think I've rambled on quite a bit. I hope this makes sense.

Then again...it is my blog. So who the fuck cares?